Redeemed: To buy back. To change for the better. To atone for. To restore.
Today I held my little girl for the first time in her almost six weeks of life. It was a glorious hour that I'll never forget. Each moment and movement so vividly carved forever in my memory. Oh, how I love this child.
For a long time I've been afraid of the day they would tell me I could hold her. I held Mary Grace and Madelyn as they breathed their last breaths. To me, holding my child meant a painful goodbye.
I worried for weeks that Olivia's life would end the same way - that my first time to hold her would also be my last. There was a part of me that had been hurt so badly and, whether I fully realized it or not, I was trying to guard my heart from more pain.
Over the last few weeks something in my heart began to change. I ached to hold her.
In my mind, yesterday afternoon was the beginning of redemption.
O Israel, hope in the Lord!
For with the Lord there is steadfast love, and with him is plentiful redemption. (Psalm 130:7)